Family therapy

I have been reading up on the different forms of family therapies to prepare for my new job. It involves revisiting what I have read in SW 4101 including all the essays and readings. Reading my previous essays is quite an enlightening experience. Sometimes I will be in awe that I actually felt and thought in a particular sort of way. Other times it is encountering past questions that continue to haunt me.

A lot of times, identifying problems in families is not exactly difficult. It's how to get out of that cycle of behaviour that is difficult. To simplify things, let's start with myself. I often caught myself by surprise when I get emotional about certain things. Emotions that I never knew existed. I could revisit my past and tell you why I behave in a certain way. Why I am so complicated. So not what? How do I go about fixing this "problem"? It involves peering into my beliefs structure and shaking the foundations. It involves being open to the outpouring of emotions that have resulted from all the shaking. Are you willing to subject yourself to this?

Action movies

I never liked watching action movies or should I say I thought I would never like watching movies with a lot of men and a lot of blood and a lot of sweat and dirt. Until this year...

The cool action moves...the muscular hunks might have contributed to it. But those are minuscule in comparison to my feelings. I feel touched when I watched action movies. Like this one:

The protaganists in these movies are always standing up for something that they believe in...something worth fighting for. It could be one person or a group of people and they never sought out to make a difference but just to save or protect what they believe in. I am moved by their courage and passion. Because it is what I would like to be.

It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against any injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.

- Robert F. Kennedy

We need to stand for something greater than ourselves.

One day Lobster Firefly Tour

Time: 635 am

We are on our way towards to Tuas Checkpoint. Tired. I slept less than 3 hrs the night before.

We are in Malaysisa! This is my traveling companion, Mr. M tucking into his very very oily guotiao. It's amazing how there are sooo many aunties around us at the coffeeshop n how awake they are so early in the morning. Next stop: Ostrich Farm.

I have a fear of dirty toilets. It scares me. Stepping on human pee is just eww. Here's a picture of the tandas at the ostrich farm. Very kampung style.

Ostrich chicks. They were forever eating and snapping their beaks at things. Everything. Wires and I believe my finger if I were to try and pat it.

This is a REAL ostrich. It seemed a little stoned though. It just stood there and let us touch it. Its mouth was always open. I wonder why.

These cocks were allowed to roam freely in the farm and they were really tame. Surprising.

Ostrich meat. It tasted like chicken though. Mr. M looked so happy to be eating. Must be really hungry. Humans are really funny things. One moment we are happily taking pictures and saying how cute the chicks are. The next moment we are eating them.

Tau sa pia!!! Super nice. I love Malaysia's tau sa pia! The crust is not so crumbly and they are pretty generous with the filling.

That's us. I was trying to protect myself from the sun hence the robber look.

I was trying to apply what John Ang taught me in special areas. Taking creative photos with not too much details. Have I learnt well? Next stop: Desaru Fruit Farm

I was not trying to take a picture of the girl. This is a dragon fruit plant! I never knew that dragon fruit is a member of the cactus family. Cooollll.

This was our guide, Nor.

A random shot of a really pretty flower. Flowers are such mood lifters.

Scary Kois. They will just swarm towards the food source. They were pretty though with all the different colours.

The thousand hands Guanyin banana. What a name.

Cat mountain king (direct translation) durians. I remember eating at Geylang and two cost S$70. It's the most expensive durian.

We saw this monkey that can drink from a straw and shook people's hands and refused to let go.

All about bees. I love the honey they served! Yum yum. A little fact I learnt: Don't put your honey (Not that human honey) in the fridge or drink it in hot water. It kills the enzymes (the good stuff) in them.

My bus mates feasting on durians. Yum Yum. But they are really heaty.

Kota Tinggi. Pardon my bored face. There was really nothing to shop there. I couldn't buy my smarties choc at 7 eleven store cos' they didn't have change for a RM$50 note. Business seems really slow.

Yeah this was how it looked like. Looks like a photo from 70's - 80's Singapore. Rustic and peaceful.

Firefly boat ride. Pretty ain't it? The sky, the land the sea made a beautiful picture. The tranquil atmosphere soothed a person. I love nature.

We were all in this luminous life jackets that were old and "chui3". Mine was held together by 2 strings. Anyway I think we provided some form of entertainment for the locals cos' we looked like refugees or some shipwrecked survivors travelling in a boat.

Cruising into the dark. No more photos were taken cos' it got too dark. Fireflies were really pretty and tiny insects that glowed like Christmas lights on trees. I remembered when I was Sec 3, I went on a school trip to KL to look at fire flies. And I caught one! Ok it's actually not allowed but I didn't know! Anyway it looked like a flying ant that has eaten a small light bulb.

Trip was fun. Food could have been better. Tandas were not as scary as before. Will love another overseas trip.

Quote of the day

What makes a man a man? A friend of mine once wondered. Is it his origins? The way he comes to life? I don't think so. Its the choices he makes. Not how he starts things, but how he decides to end them.

John Myers, Hellboy

....

My Dad just said that the "worker" in the word "social worker" sounds so low class. If it was one year ago, I would have been dreadfully insulted. But now, I just laugh it off. Afterall, it's what I think and believe in that really matters.

Leader of The Band

An only child
Alone and wild
A cabinet maker's son
His hands were meant
For different work
And his heart was known
To none --
He left his home
And went his lone
And solitary way
And he gave to me
A gift I know I never
can repay

A quiet man of music
Denied a simpler fate
He tried to be a soldier once
But his music wouldn't wait
He earned his love
Through discipline
A thundering, velvet hand
His gentle means of sculpting souls
Took me years to understand.

The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul --
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band.

My brothers' lives were different
For they heard another call
One went to Chicago
And the other to St. Paul
And I'm in Colorado
When I'm not in some hotel
Living out this life I've chose
And come to know so well.
I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go --
I thank you for the kindness
And the times when you got tough
And, pap, I don't think I
Said 'I love you' near enough --

The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through
My instrument
And his song is in my soul --
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
I am the living legacy
To the leader of the band


I so adore this song.

A day in the life of a staff who is leaving

I am quite free at work. All I have been doing the past few days is to slowly type my handing over list. Cos' I am leaving, I can't take on any new projects. So all I do is to answer phone calls, read letters, fill in letters and type on the same word document. I can't imagine how I am going to do this for the next 2 weeks. Normally one gets tired from doing too much work. I am tired cos' I have nothing to do. I shouldn't complain of course... rest is gooooood.

What's very interesting are my conversations with the elderly residents in the centre. They like to pop into the office and show me photos of their families or say some wise words about the real world to me. I realise it really takes a open heart to listen to their words of advice. Not that they are saying anything bad. But the problem with young people (me) is that we tend to treat these pieces of advice accumulated over years of living on planet earth as things we already know. Too smart for ourselves. But today I really listened to what my residents were telling. Perhaps some synaptic connection formed in my brain. That what they are saying, albeit a little long and repetitive, are lessons in life that I should reflect and think about. Afterall, they are experiences that have been collected throughout the whole of the resident's lifetime. This is akin to collecting inspirational quotes or motivational stories.

patiencehumilitypatiencehumilitypatiencehumilitypatiencehumilitypatiencehumility

My "past" ambitions

I always wanted to be a truck/van driver...like those who deliver milk cartons to people's houses. Yeah that was my dream when I was about 7 years old? I would be wheeling my little toy trucks and pretending that I was a driver who was happily cruising along some highway.

It was during the same "truck driver" period that I wanted to be a police officer. Wielding a gun and running after criminals just seemed absolutely like the perfect job. The ambition was tweaked a little when I got older. I wanted to host "Crimewatch". "Tonight we are looking at men who preyed on old ladies...." and I can end with some tag line that says "Be ready. Be prepared. Low crime doesn't mean No crime." COOOOOLLLLLLLLLL.

Along the way, I also wanted to be a nurse so that I can jab needles into primary school kids...a zoo keeper...a tour guide who can scale mountains and fight bad guys....something like Indiana Jones (yes I know he isn't a tour guide) and the list goes on.

Then I got older and I decided that I should set up a shop that sells bread or flowers....or bread and flowers. It felt so good to be wearing a nice flowery apron and picking up suitable flowers for customers and then smashing dough to make some nice bread. I still want to be a florist by the way. Flower therapy. A new counselling method.

I took an architecture module in school and I absolutely adored it. I never knew how much work goes into the seemingly bored looking angular shaped buildings we see all the time. So I wanted to be an architect. But that was really a day dream.

If I am not a social worker, I would have chosen to be a doctor. Cos' sometimes physical pain has to be alleviated before anything else can be done.